Hello, it’s me again, your favorite Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp advocate. If you haven’t read my personal account of reaching level 99 in this thrilling little game, you’re missing out big time.
That said, I’ve since reached level 105. As a self-proclaimed Pocket Camp expert, let’s review my list of recommended updates and features for the coming year. As Pocket Camp just celebrated its one-year anniversary, the timing feels especially appropriate.
1. Pocket Camp: The Streets
Imagine you start up Pocket Camp and immediately receive a digital shiv to the gut. That’s right, it’s Pocket Camp: The Streets.
This expansion is inspired by my eclectic upbringing in Baltimore City. Forget about collecting fruits and bugs. On The Streets, you collect things you need to survive. Join your gang of choice and represent your brothers and sisters in branded apparel. Level up your character with ink that shows your loyalty to the cause.
Throw up your sign as you trade drugs for cold hard cash. There’s no time to build friendships on The Streets. Bunnies are your enemies, and you’ll do anything to defend your own kind. Whoever acquires the largest following wins.
No mercy, no second chances.
2. Pocket Camp: Inception
There’s nothing like a bit of inception to shake up a game where very little action happens. Let’s inject some excitement into Animal Crossing with Pocket Camp: Inception.
Launch the game and create a character for your character. Watch as your character’s character meets the same exact characters you’ve already met. Nothing beats fishing at Lost Lure Creek after you’ve literally fished at that exact pond.
Is this the same crucian carp you caught only moments before? You’ll never know.
3. Pocket Camp: IKEA
Tired of the same, mundane furniture appearing at the Market Place every time you power up Pocket Camp? Well, you’re in luck. Download Pocket Camp: IKEA for a full furniture face-lift.
Toss those Modern Tables out and replace them with a Black Leather Convertible Couch. Watch in awe as your tiny character attempts to build this complicated structure with the two stumps it has for hands.
Why settle for a Minimalist Chair when you could spend hours building an Extendable Dining Table with 2 Extra Leaves and Seats 4-8 Animals instead? Don’t forget to stick around as your character jumps for joy once finishing the prolonged assembly process, just to be brought back down to reality as the entire thing falls apart and bursts into flames.
4. Pocket Camp: Millennial Sh*t Show
Get lit with the Pocket Camp: Millennial Sh*t Show expansion pack. Collect and eat all the Tide Pods before time runs out. Floss your way over to the hospital for a quick stomach pump, and make sure to post at least 34 selfies along the way.
Once you’re #discharged, head over to your $2,000-per-month studio apartment for some Netflix and chill before it’s time to get back to your unpaid internship with Tom Nook.
5. Pocket Camp: Bar Mitzvah
Mazel Tov! You’ve made it to the big day. It’s your Bar Mitzvah, and you’re ready to party.
Invite all your animal friends to the celebration honoring your passage into adulthood. You’re playing a game about tiny animals collecting fruits and nuts, so this couldn’t be more appropriate.
My Bat Mitzvah, in particular, featured a DJ and too many line dances. So, get everyone in formation before you cotton-eye joe your way into level 105—just like yours truly.
Don’t forget to give everyone in attendance a gift before they head home for the night. Perhaps something memorable, like another fruit beetle.
You heard it here first: These ideas are what I’d like to see in Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp throughout 2019. What do you think of them? And what would you really want to see in the game? Let us know in the comments!
The Couch Bandits 